..To have someone stomp on your heart just when it's broken to pieces is the worst feeling you could have.. To realize that there are some things you have to handle alone because no matter how hard you try, you could only let out so much and people will never understand the way you want them to.. It's frustrating and just makes you want to give up but you know you can't.. You can't just give up after holding on for too damn long.. So, you're stuck with everything you're feeling, everything you're thinking and the rest of the world goes on.. You wonder if you're ever gonna stop feeling sorry for yourself.. You wonder if it will ever get better.. You wonder if you're gonna be okay the next time it hits you.. Those random moments when it suddenly hits you that maybe, just maybe, you're making the wrong choice and holding on to the wrong person for all the reasons you just think are right.. You panic, you think back to everything, every experience and every choice you've made looking for a sign.. Just one reassuring sign that somehow, you're doing the right thing.. It might not always be happy and you might get hurt a lot but it's still right, at least eventually, it will get right and you'll be alright.. You drown yourself in pity, you wallow in your misery and you blame the world for being so unfair. You keep wondering why but unfortunately, no one gets to answer for you. You're left having to justify everything and hope that you'll find an answer.. You force yourself to believe there's gonna be an answer because that's the only way you can possibly get through.. You get so close to begging.. for someone, anyone to just make you feel you're not alone.. You break down and still try to pick yourself back up.. You're on the point of wanting to numb yourself from all the pain and yet you still try.. You still try to stay sane when all you want to do is run.. People say it's the same for everyone who get hurt by right then, when you're at your lowest you know that no one can possibly feel the same way you do..
